my phone cant type all the emotion im having
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
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