I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
Randomize
