You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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