We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
Randomize
