just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
I prefer to think of hangovers as extreme sobriety, which can only be cured by more booze
Randomize
