So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
We had to push you home in an abandoned shopping trolley. You thought you were in a pirate boat and kept yelling "AVAST, ME HEARTIES".
Randomize