So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
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