hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
Randomize
