as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
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