my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
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