do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize
