I'm gonna have a badass scar
Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
What's the point of bringing a Jack and Coke to work if my boss is just gonna piss and moan about me day drinking again?
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
Randomize
