Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
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