Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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