She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
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