just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
Randomize
