just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
Randomize
