Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
Drunkenly found an error on my bar tab last night. THANK YOU ACCOUNTING.
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
Randomize
