so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
The power of my boobs compel you
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
