Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
Just realized I've gone to court three different times with papers and a joint roller in my briefcase. #lawyeroftheyear
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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