How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
Please stop calling me a pterodactyl during sex. It only happens when you're drunk, but still.
Randomize
