playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
Shit day. Some kids decided to open my car at 3 AM while I was at work and the alarm went off. I went after them with a sword but they were minors so I didn't kill them.
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
Randomize