sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
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