you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
Randomize
