This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
Randomize
