Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
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