Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Randomize
