i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
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