she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
Randomize
