her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
Please remind me tomorrow that I ate a loaf of jimmy johns bread on the toilet 5 mins ago
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
