I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
So I'm about to drive his drunk ass home and he spits on my car. Before I can say, "Dude, what the fuck?!", he puts his finger to my lips and goes "shhh, its in the past."
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
my penis made a compromise with my morals
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