My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
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I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
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And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....