Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
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