Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
