I was so drunk last night that I went into my 15 year old sisters room to have her peer edit the drunk texts I was sending to my ex.
Walked into this guys room, saw a tickle me elmo under his desk with white stains in its mouth. This is awkward.
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
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