glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
Another guy on Tinder just asked about "the hotter girl" in my pictures. I fucking hate being your friend.
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
