i think i have herpe
just one?
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
Randomize
