remember when u banged some random dude twice in the back restaurant room of the bar i work at with customers still there? and woke up with an enormous highschool-sized hickey this morning? no big deal.
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
In America we eat man semen.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
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