you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
Randomize
