North Korea, Best Korea!
i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
Contemplating These 27 Questions Will Make Your Brain Explode
If I'm not up by 8, will you please knock on my door?
That depends, can you stop texting me while you're masturbating?
I CAN STILL HEAR YOUR VIBRATOR.
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
25 People Confess The Most Shocking Things They’ve Ever Seen In Public
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring