Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
I met my future husband in an elevator. Think Hispanic version of Dr. Bunsen Honeydew from the Muppets, but with eyes like Michael Fassbender.
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
Got wasted in a little tiki hut by the beach yesterday. Woke up with a coconut and half of a mushroom burger in my purse. I also have a picture of our Romanian bartender's fingernails on my phone lol
Why do you always wake up with meat in your purse?
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
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