Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
Randomize
