Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
Randomize
