Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
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