her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
You were so drunk that some guy dressed as Harry Potter pointed his wand at you and screamed "Accio SHITSHOW"
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Randomize
