What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize