I can't watch pbs sober anymore
somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
After 3 dates I think I'm failing at painting the "sweet guy with a future" picture and more painting the "this is the guy to call when you've run out of options and want to get fucked in half drunk to forget about it" picture.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
Maybe he injected his testicle?
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
Randomize
