Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
3 2 1 whiskey
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
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