why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
Dude. My knees have no hair on them and they're bruised. My thigh is killing me. I have about 1000 texts to about 5 exes which I horribly regret. I have pictures of my own penis on my phone. I can't find my iPad. And I have work in an hour.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
Randomize
