No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
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