You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
Are you kidding me. My sex life has diminshed to having wet dreams about jerking off.
Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
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