New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
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